The Body Keeps the Score Card | Katie Delaney on Burnout, Boundaries, and Building Back

So this season, we are looking at the ripples that form before we can see them, the ones that build quietly, sometimes even invisibly over time until something shifts. And today's conversation is about that kind of ripple, the one that forms when a high performing woman who's been giving to everyone else finally asks herself, what am I actually doing this for and what is it costing me?

We talk about burnout as if it arrives suddenly, just one day we're burned out, but it doesn't. It accumulates and it accumulates over years of skipped meals, broken sleep patterns, the slow erosion of knowing who you are outside of what you deliver. So my guest today spent, has spent actually more than 20 years working in the pharmaceutical industry. She's been aspiring, delivering and showing up for everyone.

But By the end of 2020, she's going to tell us a story about how she reached a point of privately knowing that she just couldn't keep moving on this way anymore. And what came next? It wasn't really a pivot, but it was more of a process for her and what she built from that process as a as a functional medical met actually known a little a lot. OK, I'm going to start that over.

It's a functional, I did, I've read this so many times, it's a functional medicine certified health coach, right? Okay, I'm going to start again.

Yes.

So this season we are looking at the ripples that form before we can see them. The ones that build quietly and sometimes even invisibly over time until something shifts. And today's conversation is about that kind of ripple. The one that forms when a high performing woman who's been giving everything to everyone finally asks herself, what am I actually doing this for and what is it costing me?

And we talk about burnout sometimes as it arrives suddenly from one day to the next, but it doesn't really. It builds and it accumulates over years of skipped meals, broken sleep patterns and a slow erosion of knowing who we are outside of what we actually deliver day to day. And my guest today has spent more than 20 years in the pharmaceutical industry. She's been aspiring, she's been delivering and she's been showing up for everyone. And by the end of 2020, she had reached a point of

privately knowing that she just couldn't keep going the way that she was. And what came next wasn't a pivot. It was a process. And what she built from that process as a functional medical certified health coach, a program creator, and an author, which she's going to share more about, is exactly the kind of Ripple that this season is about. So Katie Delaney, hello. Thank you for being here and welcome to the Ripple Network.

Awesome. Thanks Sabine.

Yeah, I'm excited. And I thought what we should do before we start is we should just give a shout out to Ross Pettit, right? Because he's the one that introduced us. love because I think network is so important and we forget about that sometimes. And these networks I think are important for us to keep. I mean, you've had a long growing network and a relationship, a professional relationship with Ross and I have as well. I would just like to thank him for making this introduction because he definitely saw

our two grooves and what makes us also light up besides our day job. And thanks for that introduction, Ross.

So I mentioned in the introduction that you had a big pivot in 2020. You've been working a long time in the industry. You like what you do. You were enjoying the work that you were doing, but it just got to be a bit too much. And I'd love for you to share that story.

Sure, I'd be happy to. And yes, it's 2020 where I came to that realization that something had to shift, but it was, as you had mentioned in the intro, burnout just doesn't happen overnight. It's years in the making, and that's exactly my experience with it. 2020 was kind of coming off the year, well, it was coming off the year of 2019, where in December I had made a visit to the emergency room because I thought I was having a heart attack.

I had numbness down my left arm and I was scared.

And so I went to the emergency room and thankfully I was not having a heart attack. But what they told me was that because I carry stress in my shoulders and my neck, I created a pinched nerve. And so that was really a realization to me, like, I should probably make some changes. And so I decided, you know, I'll schedule a massage. I'll do a massage for myself. That sounds great.

That'll take care of all of it.

It's just once a month, I can totally do this. can go all the stress away. And so I did that for solid two months until the world shut down, right? So in March of 2020, there was no going to a massage parlor. everything was closed down. so it was, well, that's that. We're back on the wagon, just plugging away. That one hour is now free to do other things such as work.

Mmm.

Right.

2020 it was a crazy year as I'm sure many people have their own stories. Some have good stories, some don't. And mine was truly a rough year. So in the pharmaceutical industry, I was grateful. I did not lose my job. Many people had financial impact, career impact. I was not. I was fortunate enough to have my job. But when you're running clinical trials or overseeing clinical trials,

At the end of the day, there are patients in need. And we had to continue to make sure our trials were running so patients could continue to get drug, they had access to care, and that they remained safe. And so we had, as an organization, we had to make sure that we had everything in place to continue to run these studies. We also had to make sure that we were keeping up with the regulations, regulatory guidances, because regulatory agencies, they were trying to figure this out too. And so they were establishing guidances that were often

Mm-hmm.

overnight. One agency would change something, another one thought it was a great idea, so they were constantly evolving. And when you're trials in many countries, there's a lot of regulations to keep up with.

So the organization had a global task force, which I was part of, and we worked around the clock because we had to meet as a force. And when you're working in, like with different time zones, you have to have meetings set really all hours of the day to make sure that we can accommodate the time zones. So I clearly remember finishing our work meeting at 10 o'clock at night and telling my husband, I'm setting my alarm, but can you please make sure

Mm-hmm. Yeah, that's true.

I wake up for my meeting that starts at midnight. And then I would go to a meeting from midnight to two o'clock in the morning for the global task.

Katie.

Yeah, I was, refused to go on video. was like, I'm not going on video. I would go to that meeting and then I would wake up at 6 a.m. and start my day. whether, you know, at the time I also had two boys at home that were two and four years old. as a mom, if you're a mom, you just, know that kids have their own timelines, right? So you may have a plan as a mom, like I'm going to wake up at this time. I'm going to get ahead and start the day. Kids can have bad dreams. They can be teeth.

No!

Hmm.

There's so many things. So yes, I would wake up at six o'clock and I didn't know what my day was gonna hold. There was no structure to it. I try. I'm a very much like, I'm regimented. like a structure. I like a routine. And there was none of that. And so there was no time given to myself. I was just showing up.

So I had to figure out where I needed to be, who I needed to be there for, and it was just to show up. And on the outside, looked like I had it all together, because I was showing up.

Mm-hmm.

But at the end of 2020, it came to a head and I could not take anymore. I literally had an emotional breakdown. It was just that one moment where I just all released years and years of frustration, stress, resentment. It just released. And my poor husband was the sounding board for it. And he's like, I don't know what to do here.

As they are.

I don't know what to do here. And he wanted to help. He wanted to fix it. the last thing I wanted was someone else to fix my issue. And so I just needed time and space.

And I remember sitting on the couch being like, this is not me. This is not who I am. This is not who I want to be. I need to make changes. And it was in December. So you're like, January, the new year, new me, like I can make changes. Things are going to change. I was like, how can I do this? And I had heard about vision boards. And so I was like, I'm going to try this whole vision board thing.

Yep.

And that's really what set my transformation. Five years later, that 2020 version of me is behind me, and I'm so grateful for it.

Okay, yeah. And it's interesting that you, you know, I think just the story, can imagine the listeners, there's so many people nodding their head because this is something that I think so many people experience, especially in the global world that we're in today. I think the expectations that we're on almost 24 hours a day has just gotten to be very extreme.

and to actually stand up and say, can't do this anymore. I can't have a call until 11, sleep for an hour and then have another one at 12. That's just, yeah, it's just not acceptable actually for organizations to even expect that from individuals. And then if an individual says stop, that that's also respected. it's, so true. And how did your organization, how did the company react when you kind of said, okay, we just can't keep doing this?

Yeah, so I blocked my calendar. So one of the things that I did and dedicated to myself was like, have to block my calendar and

I need to commit to that because I want to have meals with my family. So I did block my calendar. And I also had discussions with my senior vice president at the time. Like this is, this is not feasible. This is not sustainable. and she heard me and she also understood because she was in the same position, right? She was attending these meetings too. And so she's like, you don't have to go to all of these meetings. Or if you go to these meetings, she was giving me an example of,

Mm.

a region conducting an inspection supporting the US and she's like, they're working overnight. I don't expect them to work the next day. Their work hours are overnight. So you have to accommodate your work life around like what needs to be done. So if you're working at night, then you take the time during the day. And it was like the permission like, that's allowed?

That's acceptable, yeah.

Why isn't leadership telling people this? Why isn't this unknown? Why are people suffering and hitting the point of burnout before they're allowed to do that? And so it was almost, that was a permission too. I had set in my mind, this is what I'm gonna do, but also understanding, well, if I really feel like I need to be at that meeting and the expectation is in there, I'm allowed to make up that time and have free time for myself another time of the day. And so it was trying to find that

So I was setting the boundary. It was not a barrier. It was not blocking any ambition. It was not blocking my drive. It was protecting me so I could show up as the best version of myself rather than a drained person that wasn't into any discussion at all was just showing up.

Right. Yeah. Yeah. And I think that that's such a valuable tip is to first of all, to set those boundaries, but also to talk about it. I think in today, also in today's society and especially in our careers that to have that open conversation is key and it actually will give you good insights about the organization that you're working for. How do they respond? Is this the right organization for you to be a part of?

Yeah.

Yeah, fantastic. And I love that you just started. know, oftentimes we hit these the really they are crossroads and where are going to go and which direction are we going to go? And I think so often we think we have to come up with these huge strategies and, know, my God, I have to have this session and I have to, you know, come up with all these plans. But you start with the vision board and that's just a beautiful place to start. Why not? And to put those things out there. So how did you

What did you put on your vision board? Like, make that a little bit clearer for us all. How did you take those first steps?

Yeah.

So, well, one, we were coming off of 2020, so there wasn't a lot of things available to me, but I also like to internalize, what, I know I'm not broken, but what is it that I need? And I don't want someone else to tell me like, you should do this, you should do that, you should do that.

Because when you're being told to do something, you're like, well, am I living up to someone else's expectations? So I don't want to live up to anybody else's expectations, but my own. Like I need to show up for myself. So I was like, I've heard about these vision boards and I think it just, I think it will be a fun therapeutic thing for me to do on my own. I can go to the store with my mask on. I can go to the store and I can get like arts and crafts and my kids can participate too if they.

Mmm.

doing it and having fun because I've had that disconnect from them for so long because I was in meetings and everything. If they see me having fun, it will be a great way for us to...

engaged. So I went to the store and I got all the things and I was like, first thing we're going to do, we're going to write the year. What colors am I going to use? Like what colors are really inspiring me for the year? And I looked up like the meaning behind all the different colors. I'm like, that's how I want to feel this year. I want to be loyal. I want to be able to show up. I want to be excited. And I was okay, got this down. And then it was like, I want to take a vacation. want to take a week vacation, not just a long week. I want to take

Right.

vacation just one just one vacation I want to read four books this year and I was never I wasn't even picking up books I was like I want to read four books I can read order and to me reading is just something that's calming and peaceful so I was like I want to read I want to go get that monthly massage I'm gonna block my calendar I'm gonna get out there for 20 minute walks I can walk in the morning and if there is a call and I don't have to be on camera

Mmm.

get outside, I'm going to move, I'm going to I have access to this, I'm going to get out there and get in with nature. So it was just small things that slowly allowed me to be self-aware, to give back to myself, to fuel myself, to energize myself. And slowly, it was something that was feasible for me to do. It wasn't these big changes that were easily going to fall back into my old patterns. It allowed me to slowly break

Mm-hmm.

old patterns that weren't serving me and slowly start to create new patterns that were serving me and were sustainable.

Hmm.

Right and I'm making an assumption here that you actually took one, you just started with one and then did you build another one in and again it's this idea that you don't have to do 20 things at one time. It's like okay what's one thing you started with the walking, you started with the board, you then started to block your calendar and then it's this roll on effect I think because you start to feel more comfortable with these activities that you're doing.

Yes, that's absolutely correct. You can't do all the changes at one time. It's just not feasible. It's overwhelming. And we want to eliminate that overwhelm. We've been overwhelmed for two

Then you get stressed making these new calming habits because I've got to do all these. Yeah, one of the one of the first times that we spoke, actually, because we spoke almost, gosh, quite some time last year before we decided to schedule a podcast today. And the trigger was the book that you had written. That was one of our first conversations.

Not exactly, yes, no, Starting with one thing at a time and building on them. Yep.

So share share a bit about that that also started from this this phase that you were that you were in and the idea for the book.

Mm.

Yes, absolutely. So the book is titled, Back Control of Your Life by Setting Boundaries. And it's really a book written for all the previous versions of myself. So it was the version of the person who was just becoming a mom, but the version of the person that has all of these other external relationships and they have all these expectations and they're serving all of the other people around them. They're the career-driven women

who want to still show up and climb that corporate ladder and don't want to say no because they fear that they're not going to get ahead because they're setting their boundaries. And it was like, I wanted to write this book to all of those previous versions to allow them to permission to set the boundaries. It's not going to hurt you. It's only going to set you up for success. And when we set boundaries, we often feel this guilt.

What are we all gonna think?

What are other people going to be think? What if they get mad at me because I can't do it? And we have to allow ourselves to be okay with that. Other people can think and say and do whatever they want and that's their own perception. It comes back to like, what do we want? How are we serving ourselves? How are we able to show up as the best version of ourselves? And how can I help them later on when I have that availability, when I am able to give them my full

Hmm. Yeah.

So it's like you have to put yourself first because otherwise you're not gonna ever be able to really pull from poor from a full cup. You're always going to be draining yourself. And so I really wrote that book as permission to those prior versions of myself being like I wish I had known this. I wish I had had the confidence to be able to set these boundaries and like stand up for myself rather than standing up and

allowing everybody else's perceptions and expectations kind of form who I was.

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, it's interesting. Also, it's also reputation and that we're talking about this whole concept about burnout because I think we have to be cautious around that. It's also a word that that's almost become overused. And I think sometimes people use burnout in a way that doesn't represent like what you experienced. Or a friend of mine is also having a really difficult time now also with illness and the workload. And it's just become all too much. And she's like,

What's my reputation? What is this going to do to my reputation? And it's such a shame that this level of exhaustion that we have that one of the first things that comes to our mind is what is this going to do to my reputation? Not about how am I going to take care of myself so I can continue and have a healthy life and the balances that you're talking

Exactly.

Yeah. And and what I think is also interesting is that you focus on high performing women. And traditionally, we don't think about high performing women equals having these kind of challenges and struggles because they show something that's completely different. And it's and it's I have this interesting example. I went to a session.

Mm-hmm.

last month, I think it was. And it was also about stresses and how do we deal and show with things, show, show stresses that we're experiencing. And we measured our blood pressure and pulse throughout this, throughout the seminar. And we each had to get up at one point and do a mini two minute presentation and talk about a really difficult time that we had, either it can be private or in your career. And so I got up and I had an example from, from the, from my career.

And everyone was like, whoa, that was a pretty heavy example that you gave, but you were totally calm. Nothing came through. You're like you talked about it like, you you're picking flowers outside. But they measured my blood pressure, my pulse. It was higher than anybody else. So that shows for me, I'm very good at what I present to the outside world. But what's happening inside is not the best.

And I think that when you look at a lot of high performing, that could be the case. And so we were not potentially spending enough time listening to ourselves and looking what's happening inside. We've learned to have this calm, incredible professional facade that goes to the outside world, but inside something completely different is happening. And do you see that in some of the women that you coach as well?

Mm-hmm.

Absolutely, absolutely. And I love that example that you just gave because I love data. I love data. Because I am definitely a data journalist.

I can be a data point for you, Katie.

I am a data-driven person and that's the perfect example because on the outside if people see us as the person that can constantly show up and we can give all this stuff to and have all these expectations and they're still delivering we can keep giving more and internally you're like suffering but you may not necessarily feel it or show it

Feel it. Yes.

But you have the devices that are saying otherwise, and that's what's giving you the awareness, like, my gosh, I could be really doing harm to myself. Maybe I should look more into this. What is causing this? And so that, I think that's so important to be able to have. like in the discussions that I'm having with these individuals that I coach with, it's almost like they're talking. And when I reflect back, they're like,

Yes, that's what I'm feeling. Yes. And it's almost like they're feeling seen and they're feeling heard and they're realizing that, my gosh, that's not acceptable. That's not the way it is.

Yeah, exactly. That is not normality. What we've what we now consider normality is absolutely not. Yeah.

Yes. Yes, absolutely.

Hmm. And so the data that is interesting because we did speak about that too. So I'm happy to be a data point for you. No problem. But I think too that how else do you because I think that's one of the things that you really look at as well. And you try to pull in to the way that you work and what you do. Are these data points? Is that right?

Yeah, absolutely. So when we talk about stress, there are so many studies that talk about the negative impacts of stress in our body. And so I remember it myself looking in the mirror being like, my gosh, I can see it in my face. I am completely drained. I feel extremely bloated, but I don't know how because I don't really eat because I don't have time to eat. Like I'm just going with the flow. And it's all like this. The stress.

impacts your ability to digest. It totally impacts your immune system so you could be getting sick more. And it's like, a lot of people aren't really, they're like, I'm getting sick because this is the flu season. This is the cold season. Or I'm getting these migraines because I'm just sitting in front of a computer screen. And it's like, there's a deeper root cause for all this. And that's why I love the functional medicine approach. And because you're really looking at root cause. You're doing the deeper dive in like your environment and like what is

environmental impact, like where are you placing yourself and how is that having an impact on you. So going through that and there's again when we're talking about functional medicine, this is a long...

It's something that's been around for a really long time, but it's kind of becoming more of a buzzword. Like people are like, functional medicine. like holistic approach to wellbeing versus the traditional medicine approach where you're taking a medicine to help with that headache, not really getting down to the root cause. So I really like the data, the drip, and we're all our own data points. It's a matter of like, what is going on internally with you? When we're talking about burnout or exhaustion or draining, like nobody's going to be able to fix that.

Mm-hmm.

Hmm.

But you, so you tell me the data. You tell me what you're going through. You tell me about your experiences. Tell me where you've been. Tell me where you're at right now. Tell me where you want to go and let's talk through that. So I think that's really important because you're your own data point. But then there's tons of studies and I love, love, love, scholarly articles. Not just this looking on Google, getting an AI search. I'm talking like scholarly research and that's the doctoral side.

Mm-hmm.

of me going into my doctorate but I like looking at these studies because I like seeing what people have researched and there's a lot on burnout and there's a lot on high-performing women globally and one of the other things that I have found is the impact of not sleeping. There are a number of studies on the detriments of lack of sleep. There is a global study that has shown people who sleep

Mmm.

less than four to five hours a night are basic, they're equivalent to a drunk person walking. And it's just, yes.

Well, and people are proud of that. You hear people that are proud, I only sleep four to five hours, it's all I need. But you're saying the data says something different.

Mm-hmm.

You're basically a drunk person. And if you imagine after you've had a few drinks, you're not thinking clearly, you're not speaking clearly, you're not firing on all cylinders, you're not delivering quality work. It has detrimental impact. And as you mentioned, people wear that lack of sleep as a badge of honor. I used to do it.

Mm-hmm.

I used to be like, I just need five hours of sleep. Six would be great, but if I can get five hours, like I'm good to go. Because I didn't know any different. That's like basically a nap. Now I'm like seven to eight. I feel like that is okay and sustainable because you're able to get through the day. You have your coffee, you have your energy drinks. You're able to keep yourself fueled, fueled and fired up and continuing to go through, go through the motions because you

Mmm.

Mm-hmm.

have.

supplements to be able to allow you to do that. But when you get seven, eight hours of sleep, you're fully allowing your body to rest, reset, and rejuvenate. When you have four to five hours, your body is not able to do that. That's when you're getting sick. That's when, I mean, gosh, that's some of the things that's where cancer comes from. I mean, it's terrible. But like you really need to allow your body to get rid of the bad cells, replace them with

good cells and it's all happening during a sleep cycle. So sleep is so so so critical and it's one of the number one things that people will eliminate or reduce because they're busy or they're not able to shut their minds off because they're constantly thinking about the to-do list or when I was working in the global company it was we had our personal phones that we had teams messaging on all our emails our calendars were on our personal phone and I use my phone as my alarm clock so it was right

you

Mm.

Right.

next to my bedside and I would hear it vibrating right next to me all night long because again we were working for a global company that's impacting your sleep and when you wake up in the morning the first thing you do is you're getting your phone to shut off the alarm and you're looking like oh my gosh and you immediately go into a high cortisol state and it's terrible so it's like you really truly need to allow yourself the opportunity to sleep like take sleep as it's not

yeah.

Yeah.

Yes.

It's not a luxury, it's a necessity. You have to get the good sleep. You have to have that environment. You have to have the quietness. You have to have peaceful sleep to allow your body to recover.

Yeah, you're right, it's not a luxury. So true.

And what about I've heard from people and actually it's interesting my husband started doing this taking a 20 minute well sometimes he doesn't always take a nap he calls it his meditation time. I don't know if he's meditating or taking a nap but during the day so that's his lunch break as he'll go and he now has regularly started doing that and I've heard that from other people as well that they.

you

go away for 20 or 30 minutes and then they're back and refreshed. Is there any data around that? Is that also beneficial throughout the day to have that nap time?

Yeah, so there are, I would say I haven't dug into it enough to be like this is what I, this is what the research says. But there are some studies that sort of like naps just like your husband is great for the body to reset. There's other people like, well, you're disrupting your circadian rhythm. Now your body doesn't know if it's night or day. Is that going to impact you? How late in the day are you doing that? Is that going to affect your sleep long-term? So you're not getting that true length.

Mmm.

time that you need to sleep. But if he's still sleeping seven to eight hours and that's more of reset, then that's probably really good for him. But if you're taking that reset because you're not getting enough at night, your body is all walky. So I think it depends on what your situation is. It really helps figure out if that's beneficial or not so beneficial for your overall health and well-being.

Yeah, he is.

Mm, right, yeah.

Hmm.

Yeah. And how do you think, how do you encourage the women that you're working with to also that, you know, you were talking about not this, not being a luxury. It's, it's something that you have to start doing. How do you get, because they're there, everyone's heard this. we know it intellectually, we can repeat it, but how do you, how do you have individuals start embedding this type of behavior?

Yes, it is a mindset.

It is a self-awareness. It truly has to come from within. And I know personally that it really took me until 2023 to really be able to reset my sleep pattern and really get that seven to eight hours. And I went through my own coaching to really understand how can I this happen? And I was always like, I can't go to sleep early. I'm very much an early person. I mean, you need to start the day early. I like to get ahead.

Mmm.

things. I like to have me time in the morning and at nighttime I like to be able to decompress. I like to also have my quiet time and like my connection with my husband after the children go to bed. The children are taking a while to go to bed and then I'm not able to have like that one hour of connection until 10 or 11 o'clock at night. That's going to impact my number of sleeps. it was like cycling. Like how can I make this happen? Literally took me to 2023 and just allowing myself to just decide what

I needed for me and my overall well-being. I knew I was not going to give up my morning time. That is the way I needed to start my day and that's what drives me. That's what lights me up. My quiet time in my morning is everyone knows I need that in my household. They're like, she's working out, she's doing her thing. Nobody talked to her, she's going to do her thing.

Mm-hmm.

How can I, what can I change at night? And I decided that I'm gonna, after dinner, my husband always cleans the dishes and everything. So after dinner, I'm just gonna get ready for bed. And from seven to eight o'clock at night, that is my quiet time. And I hope that my husband is able to join me on the couch, you know, watch a show or just have a conversation. And the kids know, they're like, they have to go off and do their own thing. If they wanna be on the couch and like join,

That's okay, but it's not like asking me to do something, needing to do something. It's not an after. It's like we're watching show and we're connecting, but that's one hour. That is my time where I sit in my corner, I have my spot, and I just decompress. I just let the day be. The phone's in airplane mode, off in another room. The watch is off, that I can get pinged on. Everything is off, so I truly have that one hour. And that helps me get into, this is bedtime routine.

Mm, mom, mom, mom, yeah.

It helps you relax.

Mmm. So you have your own bedtime routine. I love that.

Yeah.

I do. And so we'll do seven to eight and then it's okay. The boys need to start getting ready for bed. And by nine o'clock, I am in my room and this is my bedtime. like, maybe if my husband, we have two kids, so we, it's like divide and conquer. So we each get one kid. And so if my husband comes down around the same time, we'll maybe have a conversation and catch up then. Or otherwise, like I'm sound asleep and he's a night owl. So he also likes to have his own

Mm-hmm.

And so he does his own thing too. So that is what I needed. And so that's what I work walk through the clients that I coach It's like what is actually gonna work for you. What what do you want to accomplish? Are you a morning person? Are you a night person? How can you restructure or Restructure the day that you want to I can't tell you the way it's gonna work best for you that has to come from within But I work together to help you strategize on what's gonna work for you So you can get that seven to eight hours so you can

Mm-hmm.

feel good with the decision. So you can feel good, you know, with that routine and not feel guilty that you're missing out on something or not, you know, not making the connection that you want to make throughout the day. So it's really about working with them to figure out like what is it that they want to achieve and how do they want to accomplish it and then we figure out what's going to work for them.

Nice. And you know what's really reassuring to hear is that it took you a few years to do this. Again, I think we have these expectations that if I start on January 1st by January 15th, I'm set. I've got it all worked out. And I believe that having realistic expectations about changes that we want to make that they can take some time. And that's OK.

It does not have to happen in two weeks or three weeks or four weeks, but it's this journey that you're on. And as long as you're taking steps in that journey, that's the important thing that you don't have to put these crazy constraints or unrealistic constraints on yourself.

Absolutely, that's correct. Yeah, you can't. I mean, this is your life. And if you're constantly putting stress on yourself, you're receiving stress externally, and then you're putting stress on yourself to do something a certain way, it's like the constant stress that you're not gonna serve yourself in any capacity. You're just gonna be in a high cortisol state, and that's not serving you. That is not serving you. You really have to get to a restful state.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Right.

Yeah, I just think that that's probably a, well, actually it's a key message for me. I take away myself. have a takeaway from this, from this session is, is that to not put stress on yourself as you're in this process, that just to relax and to breathe and to be in this space and to be on this journey, but not to like put, you know, I have to do this by this time or this has to be done. It's not a to-do list. It's a journey that you're on to, yeah, to work and improve on yourself.

Yeah.

Nice, that's such a nice message. Katie, one of the other things that I think is very valuable for people to hear about is that you and I both kind of have these dual identities, we talked about when we were together on another call. And I would love to hear how you've changed that, because you have your life during the day where you really work with your pharmaceutical companies and your.

in the quality space, so you're an SME in that. But then you also have another area with the coaching and the programs that you've put together in the book and the women that you work with is another side. I think that any tips or the way that you've evolved that and the way that you work with that would be really valuable because I can imagine that there are quite a few women that are in that space.

Yeah, absolutely. Yes, I do. I'm currently having split identities.

Hehehehehe

So I came out of the pharmaceutical world after a layoff in 2023 as a full-time employee. And since then I have continued to do some consulting work. it's some, as I mentioned earlier, I've been lit up by my career path. I really enjoy what I do and the network and the connections that I have made. And I've been successful at it. So it feels really good. That's like, it's my comfort spot. However, through my own

transformation and my own evolution, I have found a true passion and desire to really do this coaching thing and really help serve high-performing women because I feel like we could all use the support. I know I could and so I really have this desire to really grow this coaching business. So how do I do it? So right now I do I am in full control of the consulting things. I decide how I'm gonna work, when I'm gonna work and you know how many

hours, what does that look like? But I'm also clear with the organizations that I work for, like this is when I'm available to show up and I have the blocks on my calendar because I'm not going to allow consulting to burn out and you have multiple clients, it's easy to feel pulled in multiple directions. Very easy to feel pulled in multiple directions. It's a matter of showing up like, do they really need me? Can we shift things like having those discussions? But I have to set those boundaries because I want to do the coaching bit.

Mm-hmm.

And so also I know that I don't want to do pharma any long term. I know that I have an end point in mind for when I want to fully leave the pharmaceutical industry and truly dedicate my future and my time to supporting women as a coach and as a speaker and wherever else this journey takes me. I'm being very open about it. And in my social media platforms, I was...

seeing those two identities, right? So on Facebook and Instagram, I'm a wellness coach. I'm a mom and I'm a wellness coach. On LinkedIn, I am a career woman. am.

I am Farma and that's me and I was looking and scrolling but I was never active on LinkedIn. And through my own business coaching, we talked a lot about that. we had to really come to terms with like, who do I wanna be? Am I always gonna live these split identities or do I really wanna own and show up as one or the other? And I was like, well, I wanna be a coach. And so I had to make that shift.

had to make my LinkedIn profile match my Instagram and Facebook. This is who I want to be. Now obviously what you post on LinkedIn is different than what you post on Instagram and social media, but it was showing up because my true authentic self is the desire to be this coach full term.

Yeah.

Mm-hmm.

able to support people in their health and well-being. And it's not that I don't have, I don't appreciate all of the experiences in the network of that pharma. It's not like I'm disregarding that. That is still all present and I'm able to be relatable because of my experiences in the industry. But now this is who I am and this is how I can show up and support you. So I now owned the identity as a coach, a high performing.

coach for women to help them set boundaries to prevent burnout, to have a sustainable, have sustainable success in a lifestyle. So I've now owned the identity and it's, yes, I still dabble extra, know, media, what people see, I'm still doing that, but I know what my path is. And I'm very clear on that path. And to the world, they're now seeing like, she's a coach. Like this is who she's showing us. And so

Yeah.

It was uncomfortable to make that change, but it feels so good now that it's there and I've owned it and I feel so confident in that transformation.

Good congratulations on bringing those identities together. Fantastic. Katie, when you think about legacy, what? What would you describe as your legacy or that you hope your legacy to be?

Mm-hmm.

Yeah, that I'm kind and that I have been helpful, supportive, and there for people in need.

a beautiful legacy to leave. Very, very nice. Well, what a fabulous conversation and I really, really enjoyed it. Katie, thank you. And for me, this conversation is just such a clear expression of what the season is about because a lot of the ripples that you're making and the individuals that you're working with, you don't necessarily see all of the time.

Yeah.

Maybe pieces come in and you start to see the impact of the work that you have, but you don't necessarily see everything you do, but you keep going and you keep pushing through. And I think it's fantastic. In a few minutes, I'd love to learn more about where you can share with individuals where they can find you because I know that you've created an incredible 12 week program.

And that I think is also part of your legacy that you're going to leave behind with the impact that it makes on individuals. So thank you very much for what you're doing. I think it's incredible. And I think I love the stories and the examples that you've given because I think that there's so many people out there listening and questioning that potentially in their selves. How do they take the step in a new space? How do you set boundaries for yourself?

How do you potentially take two paths for a while and then make a decision to focus on one? So these are all challenges that many of us have faced and your stories and the way that you've worked through this is I think going to be really valuable for people to hear. So thank you very much. And how can individuals find you?

Yeah, sure. So on Instagram and Facebook, it's at Wellness Coach Katie D. Very, very easy. And then I have a website and so it's WellnessCoachKDD.com. And I have a newsletter that I send out every Sunday so you can join my newsletter list. And I also have details about my program. And so if anybody at any point wants to connect, not necessarily join the 12-week program,

You

Nice.

but just have a reset conversation just to talk through like where they're at and like how do they get to go where they want the desire to go. I have a free reset call and that's available to book on my website as well. So that's WellnessCoachKDD.com.

Great, well I'm definitely going to sign up for your Sunday newsletter. So that's one of the first things that I'm going to go and do. And thank you for just for your openness and sharing your story. I know that it can feel very vulnerable to do that, to share that with others, but thanks for the openness and just your honesty on the session today.

it.

Okay.

Thanks so much, Sabine, for having me. I loved having this conversation.

So thanks everyone and see you next time.